I was supposed to go for a job interview to be a French Teacher with Campbell Middle School in Smyrna. I rescheduled the interview for later in the day and ultimately I cancelled it. I kept thinking over the decision to teach French and ... I know that I could do it, but I don't know if I would have wanted to keep the job for a long time. Plus, I MUCH prefer to work as a Media Specialist. I'm not sure that I could conform to the whole school teacher life now, when I still have the highest hopes of traveling around the world.
I'm so torn, because I want to stay in Georgia to care for the house, but my heart is definitely elsewhere. I feel sick over this difficulty in choosing between staying in Georgia or even daring to dream about going abroad again. Maybe I'm killing myself for nothing and I should just relax, but my mother's situation is difficult to live with. I didn't anticipate having to take over her leadership role of our family.
I have a headache now. I honestly just want to fly away and disappear from this predicament. I described myself as selfish and spoiled to the counselor when mom and I were visiting her. Due to my travel ambitions and my difficulty at simply remaining in the U.S. I feel so destroyed at times because of this juggling of my potential fate.
What to do? Stay in the U.S., work as a librarian to build up my professional experience? Run to East Asia, have the fun that I never had, and save up money to pay off students loans and go to Australia and New Zealand for vacation? Writing it that way, the answer seems CLEAR! But if I do go back to East Asia, what do I do for money? Or do I try to go to China in September or October?
Well, in any case, I want to wait for the result from the Foreign Service, which I should have in September. I also need to wait for Walt Como, the supervisor at ExpressJet to know if he wants to hire me or not.
The D Ray James Correctional Facility posted their Library Aid position eight days ago, thus I may be "off the hook" from that work situation, lol. I'm glad... I wasn't thrilled about living in Folkston, Georgia, neither about working at a prison.
I need the Lord so much to give me direction right now.
I'm so torn, because I want to stay in Georgia to care for the house, but my heart is definitely elsewhere. I feel sick over this difficulty in choosing between staying in Georgia or even daring to dream about going abroad again. Maybe I'm killing myself for nothing and I should just relax, but my mother's situation is difficult to live with. I didn't anticipate having to take over her leadership role of our family.
I have a headache now. I honestly just want to fly away and disappear from this predicament. I described myself as selfish and spoiled to the counselor when mom and I were visiting her. Due to my travel ambitions and my difficulty at simply remaining in the U.S. I feel so destroyed at times because of this juggling of my potential fate.
What to do? Stay in the U.S., work as a librarian to build up my professional experience? Run to East Asia, have the fun that I never had, and save up money to pay off students loans and go to Australia and New Zealand for vacation? Writing it that way, the answer seems CLEAR! But if I do go back to East Asia, what do I do for money? Or do I try to go to China in September or October?
Well, in any case, I want to wait for the result from the Foreign Service, which I should have in September. I also need to wait for Walt Como, the supervisor at ExpressJet to know if he wants to hire me or not.
The D Ray James Correctional Facility posted their Library Aid position eight days ago, thus I may be "off the hook" from that work situation, lol. I'm glad... I wasn't thrilled about living in Folkston, Georgia, neither about working at a prison.
I need the Lord so much to give me direction right now.
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